I want to be able to experience fully, without restraint. People who are obsessed with remembering their experiences usually impose strict self-discipline. I want to be uncontrolled and controlled at the same time. The diary is my form of control over my life. It allows to obsessively record every detail. It enable me to remembers. (…)
I´ve seen how mythology of romance contradicts the reality of coupling and perpetuates a definition of love that creates dangerous expectations. This mythology doesn´t allow for the ambivalence that´s natural in any sustained relationships. This friction between the fantasies and the realities of relationships can lead to alienation or violence.
If men and women often seem unsuited to one another, maybe it´s be cause they have different emotional realities and speak different emotional language.
Sex itself is only one aspect of sexual dependency. Pleasure becomes the motivation, but the real satisfaction is romantic. Bed becomes a forum in which struggles in the relationship are diffused and intensified. Sex isn´t about performance; is about a certain kind of communication founded on trust and exposure and vulnerability that can´t be expressed any other way. Intense sexual bonds become consuming and self-perpetuating. You become dependent on the gratification. Sex becomes a microcosm of the relationship, the battleground, an exorcism.

The Ballad of the sexual dependency (1986)– Nan Goldin